My personal vibration is weird. That sounds odd when I say it out loud or type it anywhere, but it's a true statement.
I read about energy and people's attitudes being a result of the frequency they are vibrating at. It's all that New Age woo stuff that I don't buy into but trip across the anywhere on the Internet or talking to people or whatever. When you talk to anybody that that does yoga you come across it really fast.
I've experienced being in sync with people as we work toward a common goal as a team. I experienced that in Cub Scouts as a den leader and as a pack leader. I experienced it at work many times when working traffic and I was in sync with three or four controllers around me or even in a different place in the control room or in the country and we were doing things that made everything just come together. In traffic management I did that a lot but on a much bigger scale. A nationwide scale at times.
I felt disconnected because I choose to vibrate at a different level than those around me. Quiet guy. Usually. They can change depending on what's happening or what I am trying to accomplish. A lot of times people at work have seen the as brash but they did not understand that I had been tasked with looking out for the entire operation and so I was much bolder than I would normally be.
But even you know in social settings where friends are talking about cars or sports, because I'm not into that I vibrate at a different frequency if you want to think about it that way. And so my perceived disinterest isn't that, it's just I'm not as enthusiastic and energetic on the subject. And so I'm out of phase or out of sync.
It feels weird to have been in sync and then feel myself slipping out of sync. Even choosing to slip out of sync. I'm going through some of that with the my church involvement right now. I was getting into sync with the group leaders and such but because I am such an outsider and because I chose to continue to earn money in my career rather than retire I am falling out of sync with some of the efforts I was involved in. That's by choice both by me and by leaders. But it feels weird. And part of me realizes that when I was younger this weird feeling would lead to anger and displays of immaturity and that sort of thing. Now I just kind of shrugged my shoulders and wonder what happened in the movement.
A lot of times I can't maintain the frequency that I want to vibrate at because of either distractions brought by guilt or by anger. I find that when I stay calm and focused that I can better synchronize with what's happening and get things accomplished. When I feel guilty the voice in my head echoes way too loud and distracts me and changes my personal vibration.
So if I were to continue thinking about this odd subject where people actually believe that if they carry a rock in their pocket vibrates at a certain frequency that they can change their life how do I just? Attitude seems to be the answer that I keep coming back to. The other thing is just accepted keep doing my thing. I read all these gurus and such and the Zen Buddhist people keep saying that the teacher will appear when the student is ready. I guess that because I'm vibrating at the wrong frequency the teacher just want to come by. I know that when I take the time to stop and pray and not just hurl my requests and demands that God but sit and listen, another word for that is meditate, that my brain slows down enough to where I feel like I can hear God speaking to me. It's not an audible voice but it's more of nudges and and and thoughts that float by. The Holy Spirit works in odd ways, and I guess personal vibration can be one of those ways.
I guess what I struggle with is because I'm not in sync with everyone around me I feel like something is wrong. I've spent the last several years learning that there are different ways to approach that fought and one of the best ways is to accept that I am on my path and not theirs and move along. Enjoy the moments, stay focused on the goals, keep doing my thing. Be legendary me. The funny thing about legends, though, is that nobody really sings their praises all there in the middle of it. They do it when the stories are retold over and over long from now.
Weird.
